FROM DOUBT TO DEEP FAITH

The Touch that Transformed

Imagine that intimate, unforgettable scene in John’s Gospel (20:24–29):
The Risen Christ stands before His disciples, but Thomas was not there the first time. When the others tell him, he boldly says, “Unless I see… unless I touch… I will not believe.”

A week later, Jesus returns. He does not rebuke Thomas. Instead, with mercy and tenderness, He invites: “Put your finger here… stretch out your hand and touch…” And Thomas, overwhelmed by this grace, utters one of the greatest declarations of faith in all of Scripture: “My Lord and my God!”

This touch transformed his heart. It was not merely the physical contact, but the encounter with the living Christ—wounded, risen, real—that changed doubt into devotion, fear into faith, and a disciple into a missionary.

For us too, this image speaks. This one moment—this touch—is not just the image of one man’s conversion. It is the image of our human journey. Like Thomas, many of us need to see, touch, ask, think, and question. Jesus does not reject that. He gently leads Thomas from questioning to belief, from fear to faith, from doubt to mission. We are not scolded for our questions. Like Thomas, we are invited to seek, to touch, to believe. This scene is our story—a journey from distance to intimacy, from hesitation to conviction.

Faith That Sees Beyond

The life of St. Thomas, as seen in the Gospels, reveals a deeply human apostle—courageous in action, sincere in questioning, and committed to seeking truth. Among the apostles, he stands out for his bold willingness to die with Jesus saying, "Let us also go, that we may die with Him" (Jn 11:16), his honest openness in moments of uncertainty. It was St Thomas who had the simplicity and honesty to ask Jesus, "Master, we do not know where you are going, how can we know the way?", and the Lord had responded "I am the Way, the Truth and the Life"(Jn 14:5).

Thomas insisted on personal encounter before belief in the Resurrection, "Unless I see the mark of the nails in His Hands and put my finger into His side, I will not believe" (Jn 20:25). Far from being merely a "doubter," Thomas reflects the spiritual journey of many—those who struggle, question, and long for authentic experience. His story consoles those with spiritual anxieties and inspires all to approach God with simplicity and conviction. Once his doubts were dispelled, he became a missionary of great zeal, travelling far to bear witness to Christ, ultimately laying down his life in martyrdom. In him, we find a model of faith that is tested, thoughtful, and transformative—a beacon for all who seek true commitment and certainty in following the Lord.

St. Thomas did not stay where it was comfortable. Thomas’ journey is the journey of India’s faith. He did not remain in comfort or stay back in Jerusalem. He dared to travel to faraway lands with courage, conviction and committment. He left Jerusalem, travelled far, and arrived on the shores of India—possibly in Kerala around AD 52. He brought the light of the Gospel to our soil, to our people. His message was not just about religion. It was about relationship—a faith that integrates truth, love, and life. He preached, healed, taught, baptized, and built up communities of faith—especially among Brahmins and others who were open to dialogue. Tradition tells us he was martyred in Mylapore, Chennai.

His was not a faith of easy slogans—it was a tested and thoughtful faith. His journey to India shows that authentic faith is never passive—it acts, it moves, it crosses borders—geographical, cultural, and spiritual.

Therefore, Thomas’ doubt was not weakness. It was the doorway to a deeper truth. His honest questions led him to the ultimate answer—Jesus Christ. And this shows us something powerful: Faith is not blind. It is a decision to trust what we have seen, what others have shown, and what the Spirit has revealed.

Besides, Faith is not private. It is shared. It builds community. It is like the body of Christ—the Church—a family, a house of unity where each member lives in faith and love, contributing to one another’s growth.

Thomas teaches us that faith has three dimensions:

• Seeing – recognizing Christ in the wounds of our people, in the poor, the broken, the marginalized.
• Judging – reflecting critically, asking questions, engaging with reason and tradition.

• Acting – courageously living out the Gospel in our own time, as witnesses of truth and love.  So did many missionary priests and nuns who followed in his steps 

 In today's India—a land rich in spirituality, pluralism, and paradox—Thomas' apostolate calls us to be Christians who are deeply rooted and widely open. Faith is not an escape from reality, but an engagement with it.

As Pope John Paul II reminded us: “Faith and reason are like two wings on which the human spirit rises to the contemplation of truth.” Thomas used both: he doubted, he questioned, and then he witnessed—even to the point of death.

His contribution to India is not merely historical but spiritual:

• He planted a Church that survived centuries.
• He modeled a faith that dialogues with culture.
• He exemplified a Church that respects differences and embraces truth.

In a time when religion is sometimes used to divide, Thomas calls us to a faith that unites—across castes, creeds, and communities. His journey mirrors the Indian spirit of seeking truth through openness, just like our sages, saints, and seekers—Gandhi, Nehru, Kesab Chandra Sen, Brahmabandhav Upadhaya, and many others—all who believed in truth through dialogue.

 “My Lord and My God” – A Cry of Wonder and Conviction

Thomas’ confession is not just doctrinal—it is emotional, existential, and intimate. He does not say, “You are the Lord” but “My Lord and My God!” It’s a cry from the heart—a cry of surrender, a cry of wonder. A sigh of awe. He saw, he touched, and then he believed. That is faith—not just accepting ideas, but encountering a Person—Jesus.

It is also a faith born from experience—not second-hand, not imposed. And that makes his profession even more powerful. Thomas needed to touch. And Christ allowed it. Why? Because faith does not mean ignoring our questions. It means being brave enough to bring them to Jesus. We may come with questions. We may come with wounds. But we are invited to touch the living Body of Christ—in the poor, in the broken, in the Church.

In India today, as young people face conflicting ideologies, as minorities face marginalization, as consumerism replaces contemplation, Thomas reminds us to seek authenticity—to say with conviction: “I believe, not because it is easy, but because I have encountered Christ in life.”

St. Thomas’ faith grew stronger through his doubts. So too, our own struggles can lead us to greater trust. This feast reminds us that faith is freedom—freedom to be, to believe, and to belong. Not blind belief, but a faith that is open, searching, and alive—in dialogue with others, like Gandhi or Nehru sought through interfaith understanding.

Let this be our cry too—in the midst of suffering, confusion, or joy:

“My Lord and My God!” A whisper of awe, a shout of faith, a sigh of wonder. Not blind obedience, but a faith that sees, thinks, and acts.

Concrete Applications in Our Indian Context:

 

1. Interfaith Dialogue: Like Thomas who came into a land of multiple beliefs, we are called to respect others while bearing witness to Christ’s love. Let us promote dialogue, not division—listening and learning from one another.
2. Faith and Reason: Encourage our youth to not fear questions. Use platforms like YCS/YSM (“See, Judge, Act”) to build critical, committed Christians—open-minded, but firm in faith.
3. Community Building: In a society fractured by caste and class, let us build the Church as a “spiritual sanctuary”—a home for all. Let each parish, each small Christian community, become a place where Christ is touched through love, service, and solidarity.
4. Faith as Public Witness: Faith is not private. Like Thomas, our witness must reach the streets, schools, and struggles of the people. In political, educational, and social spheres, let Christians be known not for fear, but for fearless love.

Conclusion:

Let us remember the the fearless and courageous young military man who refused to be a bartender because he was meant to serve the country, and stood firm in his convictions. He was misunderstood.  So too, St. Thomas was misunderstood—but Christ honoured his integrity and gave him a mission.

Let us be such Christians: not ashamed to ask, not afraid to act, and not hesitant to believe. Let us be inspired by Thomas, whose journey from fear to faith, from Jerusalem to India, gave birth to a Church that still lives in our hearts and lands today.

Help us echo your words each day—not with lips alone but with lives transformed by grace:

“My Lord and My God!”

  

THE MIDLIFE JOURNEY OF NON-ACTION

 

A person who has crossed midlife can make or break, transform or de-shape his/her nearest family or community. Many years of travel treaded with fear or confidence can either fire up the spirit to build society or cause damage to life and living.  It can lead either to a religious conversion and spiritual growth, or to a life-without-the-divine. The midlife journey is always at the crucial point for 'the pilgrim’ to reach the end. It is a step towards “The Second Journey” (Gerald O'Collins).   Journeys in the middle years is meant to leave one’s familiar settings and ‘throw’ oneself into the deep or travel the strange roads. It is about taking the ‘middle path’ along with other counterparts. There are ten factors that create basic characteristic patterns of such journey. They are as follows:

1. A midlife journey happens to people due to different factors, thrust upon them. It does not happen voluntarily. Either they are through external phenomenon (crisis, accident, illness, infidelity) or inward processes (disillusionment, distress).

2. A midlife journey includes an outer component, a physical restlessness with the hope of finding a solution, or an inner component - a search for new meaning in life. One wanders physically or internally to find the journey's meaningful end.

3. A midlife journey entails a crisis of feelings: personal failure, unresolved conflicts, or fears for the future; happy or sad emotions. At this stage one learns to interpret and handle these feelings through discernment. A gamut of distressful emotions is being overcome by mustering courage to face them as non-fundamental. Trusting in the divine power then brings peace, clarity and wisdom through a realistic optimism, for what can be changed and which cannot. One surrenders to the Divine will, with acceptance and gratitude.

4. An onward midlife journey brings “the reversal of all the ideals and values that were cherished” (Carl Jung).It becomes a constant search for new meanings, values and goals. Roles are not important anymore. Past purposes and values diminish. One lose interest in retaining his/her identifiable role. Instead, one treasures other values and new identity.

5. A midlife journey, the loneliness that one goes through often, needs to be turned into the “aloneness of a quiet and integrated self-possession”. A suffering solitary pilgrimage turns into success through self-discovery and self-identification, which in turn transforms others that one encounters.

6. A midlife journey concerns the life’s end. It ends humbly, quietly, wisely with wisdom and power. Life that begins dramatically, settles undramatically. Ego-drama turns into God-drama. One becomes a true adult with wisdom, equilibrium, and with purposeful dreams. One comes to oneself and in turn reaches out to others with responsibilities and becomes productive. Ultimately, one arrives where he/she started – exploring, identifying and sharing a fulfilled life. 

7. A mature midlife journey just lets go and lets be, beyond all strategies, action plans, effort and tenacity of the past. Action to resolve problem and control, do not serve to be keys to success anymore.   They become more ineffective as one learns to let go and let be.  

8.  A mature midlife journey follows the principle: a problem is maintained by the solutions found to resolve it. One learns not to repeat the behavioural patterns that were put in place to resolve the problem. You cease to do something to change, and you change.

9. A mature midlife journey follows the principle of non-action, nishkamakarma.  "To reach a goal, you have to give it up" (Gregory Bateson). One acts in the natural order of things, allowing the nature to direct the action - a higher order of life. Such non-action leads towards the natural movement of life - an activity other than that which is defined by action. It is an inner disposition that allows the unexpected to happen. With flexibility, one accepts situations as they arise. It is made of silence and openness.

10. A mature midlife journey benefits out of the act of grace. A path of non-attachment, non-judging and a certain indifference through surrender, humility, consent (Meister Eckhart). As Jesus said that Mary had chosen the better part (non-action), a mature midlife journey follows the path of non-wanting. Consequently, the midlife journey towards self-growth and wholeness happens, finding solace and serenity in the midst of the existent realities of the world.  

 (Courtesy: Gerald O'Collins, St Ignatius Loyola and the midlife journey; Jean-Guilhem, Just let go and let be, La Croix International, May 29, 2021).